Affluent, Wealthy, and Ultra-Wealthy

Imagine a private chef named Marco Reyes who has cooked for the Dunns, an affluent family, for three years. Mrs. Dunn texts him herself about each week’s menus. She is happy for him to post photos of her kitchen on Instagram.

When the Dunns’ oven breaks, Mrs. Dunn moves Friday’s dinner to the next week. Marco cooks it then, and nobody minds.

This spring, an ultra-wealthy family with three homes hires Marco through its estate manager, Mr. Kline. An estate manager runs a family’s homes and staff. On his first day, Marco signs a confidentiality agreement. Mr. Kline tells Marco to bring every question to him, not to the family.

Two hours before a dinner for 12, the oven in the family’s kitchen fails. Mr. Kline expects the dinner to go ahead that night. Marco asks whether the family will pay to rent a friend’s kitchen across town, and Mr. Kline says yes. Marco cooks there and brings the food in by car. The dinner starts on time, and the family books him for the summer.

Marco cooks the same way in both houses. What changes is the household around him. Mrs. Dunn hires Marco, texts him, and decides for herself. She does not mind waiting a week for her dinner. The second family protects its privacy with a signed agreement and puts Mr. Kline between Marco and the family. It also wants a problem fixed that night.

Who writes to you is the quickest sign of a client’s level

Firms that study wealth sort people by how much money they have to invest, not counting the home they live in. Capgemini’s World Wealth Report splits them into three groups. The first group has $1 million to $5 million to invest. The second has $5 million to $30 million, and the third has $30 million or more. This course calls them affluent, wealthy, and ultra-wealthy.

You will not see a client’s bank accounts, so go by what you can see. The signs below are the course’s rough guide. A few of them together usually point the right way:

Affluent. The client writes to you, chooses you, and pays you. There may be a cleaner, but the client runs the house.
Wealthy. An assistant or a house manager often writes for the client, and a housekeeper or a nanny may answer the door.
Ultra-wealthy. An estate manager or a family office writes to you, and staff answer the door. A family office is a private firm that runs a family’s money and affairs. The family usually keeps several homes.

The wealthier the household, the more it guards its privacy and the more staff it hires

The household staffing agency Morgan & Mallet publishes a yearly report on the jobs it fills.

Privacy. An affluent client may be glad to see photos of their home on your Instagram. Wealthy and ultra-wealthy households often put confidentiality in writing. In Los Angeles, 77% of the personal assistant jobs Morgan & Mallet placed require confidentiality agreements. “Some households make staff leave phones at the door,” the report adds.

The people between you and the client. An affluent client usually hires you and pays you directly. A wealthy household often adds an assistant or a house manager, and the largest households add an estate manager. Most estate managers “run at least three properties at once,” the report says, and they “manage dozens of staff members.”

The person you deal with each day may not be the person you work for. So find out who approves what before the work starts.

A butler watched a family send a jet for a forgotten basketball

In 2022, The Daily Beast talked with household staff who work for the super-rich. One butler, who was not named, described how an employer’s family spends.

“Money’s not an object, it’s about what they want,” the butler said. “If one of the kids even forgets a basketball at a certain house, they’re flying a $30,000 jet to get that basketball.”

In a household like that, what a fix costs can matter less than how fast the family gets what they want. So when something goes wrong in a house at that level, plan for the fastest fix. Then agree with the household who pays for it, before you spend the money.

An estate manager’s job grew as his employer’s wealth grew

The staffing agency My Household Managed tells the story of an estate manager who spent 24 years with an ultra-wealthy family. To protect his anonymity, the agency changed his name to Alfred Penny.

Penny trained as a chef. He started with his employer as a private chef and house manager. “As his principal grew from high-net-worth to ultra-high-net-worth,” the agency writes, “Alfred grew along with him.” In time, he took charge of an art collection that he knew little about at first.

The agency writes that wealth of that size also brings risk. Penny had to stay off the internet, so that nobody could find him on Google. “There was information blackout, total anonymity,” he said.

Vendors who came to the house used the service entrance and signed a confidentiality agreement. Each one had their photo taken, and none of them could take photos in the house. “I was the gatekeeper to the castle,” Penny said. “Discretion, privacy, and security were of the utmost importance.”

So when a client you have worked for grows wealthier, ask again what the household allows. The answer may have changed since you started.

Why working the same way at every level goes wrong

Imagine a dog walker named Callie Burke whose affluent clients love the photos she posts of their dogs. Most of the photos show the street behind the dog. In March, an estate manager, Ms. Ortiz, hires Callie to walk the dog of an ultra-wealthy family.

In her first week, Callie is running late for her next walk. She posts a photo of the new dog in front of the family’s gates, as she does for every client. Then she hurries on.

That afternoon, Ms. Ortiz ends the arrangement, because the photo shows where the family lives.

Callie’s habit suits her affluent clients. Her mistake is carrying it into a household with different rules without asking first.

In the version that works, Callie asks Ms. Ortiz on her first day. “My other clients like me to post photos of their dogs. Would the family like that, or should I keep them to myself?” Ms. Ortiz says no photos at all. So Callie sends her photos only to Ms. Ortiz, and the family keeps her on.

How to serve the level in front of you

Work out each client’s level from a few signs together. Look at who writes to you, who answers the door, and how many homes the family keeps. Write the level next to the client’s name.
Before you take a photo in a client’s home, post about the job, or mention it to anyone, ask. For example, a home organizer can ask, “May I post a photo of the pantry, with nothing that shows the house?”
If a household asks you to sign a confidentiality agreement, read it before your first day. Follow the house rules on phones and entrances from the first visit.
Learn who stands between you and the client, and what each person approves. For example, an interior designer can ask the house manager, “Who approves the schedule, who pays the invoices, and who makes the final choice on fabrics?”
Decide in advance how fast you will fix a problem for your wealthiest clients. Agree with the household who pays for a fast fix before you spend the money. For example, a florist can tell an estate manager, “If Saturday’s flowers arrive damaged, I’ll buy new ones at the market that morning. Should that bill come to you?”
When a client you have worked for grows wealthier or hires staff, ask again what the household allows. For example, a tutor whose student’s family has just hired a house manager can ask the new manager, “Should I send the schedule to you now, or still to Mrs. Patel?”

Next: You will see why wealthy clients decide small matters quickly and large commitments slowly, and how to work with both.