"I Need to Think About It" Has Two Meanings

Jonathan Goodman worked as a personal trainer and now writes books for trainers. He wrote about a client he lost, whom he calls X. X was a 33-year-old actor who walked into the gym one August afternoon. “I was just passing by and thought I’d have a look at the place,” he said. Filming had just finished for the season, and he wanted to put on muscle before it started again.

Goodman offered his 50-session package, which cost over $4,000. X balked at the price, so Goodman offered his second option, 20 sessions paid in two parts. X paid the first part, and they began the next day.

After the first workout, X was in pain. He went to see his osteopath, who told him that he needed to “take it easy.” At the next session, Goodman asked about the pain, question by question, and decided that it was ordinary soreness. “After 30 minutes answering X’s worried questions, he agreed to go back onto the gym floor and continue the workout,” Goodman writes.

That was the last session. Afterward, X said that he was not sure of his schedule the next week. He asked Goodman to call over the weekend. Goodman called three times, left two messages, and sent an email. X did not reply. Two weeks later, Goodman’s manager told him that X had asked for a refund on the rest of his package. Months later, Goodman learned that X had found a trainer down the street who promised that the training would be different.

Looking back, Goodman separates complaining from worrying. “Clients complain, that’s fine,” he writes. “Worrying is not OK though, it means that they don’t understand or that they don’t trust you.” He calls the story one “about the importance of listening more to what a client isn’t saying than what he or she is.”

X’s request sounded like a question about his calendar. A calendar takes a minute to check, though, and X asked for a weekend. What he was weighing was the worry he brought to the second session, which 30 minutes of answers had not settled. Goodman took the request about the schedule at its word. The worry behind it was never settled.

X had already hired Goodman, and the step to a client who has not hired you yet is the course’s own. Here is the step. When a client says they need to think about it, they may mean exactly that. They may be waiting on a partner, a date, or a number to check. Or they may have a worry they have not said. Each one needs a different answer, so the first job is to tell which one you are hearing.

What a real delay sounds like, and what a worry sounds like

A client uses the same words for both, so it helps to know what each one is.

A real delay. The decision waits on someone or something outside the room. The client’s husband handles the money and is home on Thursday. The bonus is paid in March. The accountant wants to see the figures. Once that happens, the client can decide. Many households make their big decisions together, after you have left. So a client who wants to talk it over at home is usually telling you the truth.

A worry the client has not said. The decision waits on nothing outside the room. Something in the meeting left the client uneasy, such as the price, the plan, or whether the work will turn out well. The worry is still there when the client leaves. Time alone does not settle it, because nobody has heard it.

Two questions help you guess which one you are hearing, and both are the course’s own. The first is what the client is waiting for, and when it ends. A real delay has an answer to both, such as a husband who is home on Thursday. The second is what happened just before the client said it. A delay that comes right after the price, or right after a worried question, is more likely a worry. X asked for a weekend straight after 30 minutes of worried questions.

Neither question is proof. A client with a reason may still have a worry underneath, as X did with his schedule. So treat your guess as a guess, and let the client tell you. Ask what they will be weighing. The question takes the delay as given, so the client does not have to defend it. A client with a real delay answers at once, because they know what they are waiting for. A client with a worry often answers vaguely, or names a reason that needs no time.

How to answer each one

Help with a real delay, and agree on a date. Find the one person, date, or number the decision waits on, and make it easier. If a partner has not met you, offer a short call at a time that suits them. If the client wants to check a figure, send it in writing that evening. Then ask when they would like to hear from you, and write on that date with something new for them. Do not add a discount or a deadline, because each one gives the client something new to weigh. A client who is waiting on something months away, such as a house they have not bought, has nothing to decide yet. That is a different conversation.

For a worry, ask what the client would change about the plan. That is the course’s suggestion, because a change to the plan is easier to say than a worry. A client can ask for fewer sessions without saying that the price frightened them. Do not guess the worry out loud, because a wrong guess tells the client what you assumed about them.

Answer what the client says. Goodman names two causes of a client’s worry. Either the client does not understand something, or they do not trust you yet. A fact answers the first. A lower risk answers the second. If the change the client asks for is a smaller budget, say what a smaller budget would cover. That is less work, not the same work for less.

Imagine an event planner named Bastian Kohl who quotes Mrs. Iverson $18,000 to plan her parents’ 50th anniversary. The plan is a dinner on Saturday and a brunch on Sunday for the family. Mrs. Iverson goes quiet, then says that she needs to think about it. Bastian asks what she will be weighing. “Oh, just everything,” she says.

So Bastian asks, “If you could change one part of the plan, what would it be?” Mrs. Iverson says that she could do without the brunch. “Then the dinner alone would be $12,000,” Bastian says, and he stops. Mrs. Iverson asks whether he could start on the venue this week. She books the dinner before he leaves.

An interior designer says clients go quiet when the real numbers frighten them

In April 2026, the Interior Design Community site collected answers from designers about clients who stop replying. One designer, who posts as @haus_of_arden, said that people often want a project “with no real sense of what it’s going to cost.” Then, “once they start getting some real numbers they pull back.”

The designer went on to give the reason. “People feel uncomfortable saying they can’t afford something, so that’s when ghosting occurs.”

The designer was describing clients who go silent after a proposal. The step to the end of a meeting is the course’s own. The worry in that account is money, and the client’s way out of saying it is silence. “I need to think about it” can be the same way out, said in the room.

So the question you ask has to let the client say a money worry without saying that they cannot afford you. A question about changing the plan does that. When Mrs. Iverson said she could do without the brunch, she named her worry about the price. She did not have to say it.

A designer ends her last follow-up with a sentence that makes a no easy

A designer who posts as @michelleluvsdesign gave the Interior Design Community the email she sends when a client has gone quiet. She calls it “the way to get a yes or no.” The email reads, “Hi, wanted to check to see if you’re still interested in working with me on the project. If you’ve gone in another direction, no worries; let me know so I can close things out on my end.”

Measured against this lesson, her second sentence is the part to keep. A client with a worry they have not said can find silence easier than a no. Her sentence makes the no small and practical, and it asks for nothing more.

Her first sentence asks whether the client is still interested, which gives them nothing they did not have. A follow-up opens instead with one fact the client did not have. So keep her sentence for the last email, after the date you agreed has passed, and put a fact above it.

Why digging for a worry that is not there goes wrong

Imagine a private chef named Odile Marchetti who meets Mrs. Brannigan about cooking dinners for the family three nights a week. The fee is $2,800 a month, plus the groceries. At the end, Mrs. Brannigan says, “I need to think about it. My husband and I share the household budget, and he’s back from Singapore on Thursday.”

Odile has learned that “I need to think about it” can hide a worry, and she has a client at five. “Of course,” she says. “Is there anything about the plan you’re not sure of? I’d rather hear it now.” Mrs. Brannigan says that it is only her husband. Odile asks whether the price is a worry. “No,” Mrs. Brannigan says, a little sharply. On Friday, Mrs. Brannigan writes that they will keep the cook they have.

Odile was right that a worry can hide behind the words. Her mistake was looking for one after Mrs. Brannigan named a person, a reason, and a day. That is a real delay, and a second question about the price told Mrs. Brannigan that Odile did not believe her.

The version that works helps with Thursday. “Then let’s make Thursday easy,” Odile says. “I’ll send you a page tonight with two weeks of menus and the monthly cost, so you can show him.” Then she asks when Mrs. Brannigan would like to hear from her. “Friday morning,” Mrs. Brannigan says. On Friday, Odile writes once, with the first Monday she could start. Mrs. Brannigan books that Monday.

Asking what the client will weigh is not pressing them

A question after “I need to think about it” can feel pushy, as if you would not take the client’s answer. Many professionals would rather say “Of course” and leave.

The question takes the client’s answer. It does not ask for a decision, and it does not ask the client to defend the delay. What it does is find out what the delay is for. Goodman did not ask, and X left with his worry still unsettled. Three phone calls and an email did not reach it. A question in the room could have given X the chance to say it, while Goodman was there to answer.

How to answer a client who needs to think about it

1. Before your next meeting, write down what your clients most often wait on before they decide. Name the person, the date, or the number. For example, a tutor might write that parents wait for the school’s placement results in May. Some also wait for the other parent to agree.
2. When a client says they need to think about it, agree first, and then ask what they will be weighing. For example, a photographer can say, “Of course. What will you be weighing?” Then let the client answer, and do not fill the quiet.
3. If the answer names a person, a date, or a number, take it as a real delay. Do not look for a worry behind it. Help with that one part, and ask when they would like to hear from you. For example, a coach whose client wants to ask her business partner can say, “Would he like 15 minutes with me on Monday? When should I write to you after that?”
4. If the answer is vague, or the delay came right after your price or a worried question, ask about changing the plan. For example, a home organizer can ask, “Is there a part of the plan you’d do differently?” Do not guess the worry out loud.
5. Answer what the client says with a fact, a lower risk, or what a smaller budget would cover. Do not offer a discount. For example, a florist’s client may ask whether the arch will fit through the church door. The florist can offer to measure the door on Saturday.
6. If the client still wants time, give it, and agree on a date. Write once on that date, with one fact the client did not have.
7. If that date passes with no reply, write once more, and end with a sentence that makes a no easy. For example, a travel adviser can end, “If you’ve decided on another way to do the trip, just tell me, and I’ll let the villa go.” Then stop writing.

Next: You will see what to do when a conversation starts going wrong while you are still in the room.